Articles
Confronting Cheating Spouses: 14 Excuses Never To Fall For and Why
Aug 12th
Copyright Dr. Denise Wood, M.A., Psy.D, 2010
When you confront your cheating spouse, you will hear EVERY excuse in the book. Read on to learn which types of excuses from your cheating woman or man are totally bogus and why your cheating spouse’s excuses just don’t cut it!
Excuse Type #1- “The Denials”:
“You are just being suspicious! It’s all in your head!”
“Not him/her. She’s just like a brother/sister to me!”
“It’s only harmless flirting!”
WHY The Denials DON’T WORK: The Denials are all about denying any evidence you might have of their infidelity. The problem with their argument? It’s their word versus yours, and they are hoping that you love them enough, or are vulnerable enough to fall for it. Don’t get played! Have the discernment to trust your own eyes and what you have the evidence to know is true- not the lies coming out of your cheating man/woman’s mouth.
Excuse Type #2- “The Blame Games”:
“You always try to control my life. I just needed some space!”
“I did it because you never show me you love me anymore!”
“You drove me to him/her!”
“If you were a better spouse to me I never would have had to do it!”
WHY The Blame Games DON’T WORK: The Blame games are all about giving the cheater justification to cheat. They have convinced themselves that they were completely justified in cheating on you because of one of your actions- now they just have to convince you that it is your fault as well. Don’t let them! Your spouse had hundreds of respectful and mature options for working out any problems they could have had with you, or your marriage. It was their choice to be sneaky and deceptive, and that is Not Your Fault.
Excuse Type #3- “The Helpless Victims”:
“I don’t know how he/she got my phone number!”
“It’s a fatal attraction! I couldn’t say no!”
“He/She started the whole thing! I never wanted to hurt you!”
“He/She took advantage of me!”
WHY The Helpless Victim Acts DON’T WORK: The Helpless Victims will want to act like they’ve been hurt just as much as you have by the whole situation. They will try to draw pity from you by playing the role of the victim. Don’t fall for it! The cheater is never as much of a victim as the ones they cheat on. They were not powerless to resist the temptation of the other woman/man. Your cheating spouse had the power to say yes or no, and they said yes.
Excuse Type #4- “The Table Turner”:
“What were you doing spying on me in the first place?”
“Are you cheating?”
“What aren’t you telling me?
WHY The Table Turners DON’T WORK: The Table Turner is all about distracting you long enough to take the focus off of themselves and their mistakes. They think that if they can somehow turn the tables on you, they will be off the hook. Don’t let them! This conversation isn’t about you, your personal problems, or that argument you had last Tuesday. It is about one simple fact: Are they cheating, or are they not cheating? Don’t let Tables Turners hijack the conversation or distract you from getting to the truth.
Have a cheating quote you want to share? Submit one in our cheater stories contest and you could win a free iPod!
Win Back Your Cheating Boyfriend and Get His Attention on Date Night!
Aug 12th
Copyright Dr. Denise Wood, M.A., Psy.D, 2010
Here’s How to Get Your Boyfriend to QUIT Checking Out Hot Chicks While You’re Having a Romantic Dinner.
He’ll be paying attention to ONLY YOU in no time!
1) Wear your hottest outfit; lets face it, it is a great way to stop cheating men!
2) Flirt…with him that is!
3) Laugh at his jokes.
4) Touch his foot with yours a couple of times under the table.
5) Tell him how great he looks that night.
6) Lean in close to him while he talks; he feels validated and gets the cleavage shot.
7) Say his name a number of times in the conversation.
8.) Brush his arm or his thigh intermittently; but don’t hang on him.
9) Ask him questions about himself.
10) Tell him how interesting he is.
11) Talk about what you would like to do to him when you leave the restaurant.
12) Excuse yourself to the ladies room; he needs to see your assets!
13) Make sure the waiter seats you at an intimate table.
14) Make sure you’re the one facing the room if given the choice; his best view is you; right?
15) Tell him how great his friends and his mother are.
16) Leave before it gets too late.
17) Never look at your phone.
18) Never answer a text.
19) Tell him he has amazing eyes.
20) Tell him he’s just plain yummy and he’s what you want for your dessert. Losing sight of you will be the LAST thing on this cheating man’s mind!
Bon appetite ladies!
